Sorry for the long delay in posting this, but hopefully after this weekend, we will be well and truly back on track.
I'm back........O:-) Censor On Board - Granny Smith
"Its Not so Much The Memories I Have, Its The Memories I Leave Behind"
Kia Ora Everyone,
I know some of you are saying, about "time" (I left the "b" word out, because Granny Smith is on Board) Well here it is - the numbers you have all been waiting for !!! Sorry but they aren't the Lotto numbers. If you ever win, I will hold both hands out !!! Because of the number of new people coming on board our krazy krazy blogs, I have gone back over a couple of previous posts. But do check out the archives, because if you are a friend, you may see your name mentioned - who knows ???
Well, I won't waste any more of your time, as I know you are all "biting at the bit", waiting to get your teeth into this. Take care everyone, look after each other - God Bless !!! I love you all..........NOT !!!
Krazy Kelvin / New Zealand.
# 870. What In Blazes Is Lotto ???
Lotto is a weekly game, where you buy yourself a ticket/s from selected outlets. "Balls" with numbers 1 to 40 are placed in a barrel You can pick your own favourite numbers, or you can purchase a ticket with random numbers, selected by the computer. You can spend as little as $2 for a few numbers, or you can spend as much as you want. Some people are known to spend hundreds of dollars, trying to give themselves as many chances as possible. But...!!! Most of the money, is returned to the public in prize money, with the top prize, been a Million Dollars. There is also 2 add-ons just to make the game more interesting - One is called Power Ball. If you have the 6 correct numbers, plus the bonus number and you also get the Power Ball number, you win what ever the Power Ball amount is. Any number of people can win and have to share the tp prize/s. Correct me if I am wrong,any new Zealander (memory blockage - getting older) but I think the top prize won in Lotto has been about 14 million. The second add on - a series of numbers like a bar code is printed by the computer on each & every ticket issued. The "bar code" on each & every ticket is different of course. After the main draws, the comuter selects "one bar code". If your "bar code number " is selected, you are flown to Wellington on the following Saturday where you are given a chance to spin a wheel, which is divided into sedgements like a pie chart, with one pointer. Each sedgement represents a prize, which can be anything from a house or a car to cash - anywhere up to a million dollars. You get to "spin" the wheel live on TV, after all the draws are done. When I think about it, you would never see me on TV - I am so ugly. my face would "crack the cameras !!! (hehe)
# 871. If I Ever Won Lotto !!!
I get a lotto ticket, each & every week with a couple of other people but do you think we have won anything ??? No on your nellie - its a saying - we have not even won a $ !!! I keep my fingers & my toes crossed, in the hope that we do win. Maybe its bad luck to cross your toes. Its b***** hard work I can tell, crossing your toes !!! We have been waiting so long now, to win "something", that if we did, win "millions" I would more than like have a heart attack anyway and died. That wouldn't be the last that you would see of me though - I would come back to "haunt you" (hehe). If I ever did win, I would buy a building - start my own "internet cafe" where every person, who walked through the door, would be treated like they were "family". It would not matter if they only wanted a computer or an hour or if they wanted one for 24 hours, (I myself have done a few 24 hours stints) everyone would be treated equal. I would also start a backpackers - again everyone "family". Have a dining room, big enough to cater for the same number of people as per the number of beds. Every Sunday at 6pm, have a "hangi dinner" for all the backpackers, who just happened to be booked in for the night. After dinner, get everyone sitting down in the lounge and have a party. Not a booze party, but a sing-a-long with a guitar & have maori songs etc. Get each person (if they wanted to of course - we wouldn't twist their arm) to say a few words about themselves & the country they are from. Maybe sing a song in their language, making sure to have some cotton wool handy, to put in the ears just in case, they are out of tune. (hehe). A real H.O.M.E away from H.O.M.E - "Haven On Mother Earth !!!
# 872. Krazy Kamper Vans !!!
Someone has already beaten me to the idea, but there may be room for more - who knows ??? I don't know why they called them "wicked" because the budget kamper vans aren't wicked - they are krazy. Its the people who thought of the idea that are wicked. The kamper vans are krazy, like me !!! they are painted with "allsorts" of krazy things & colours on them. I am giving them a "plug" (telling people about them) because they are kkkrrraaazzzyyy!!! see for yourself. Don't forget though, tell them it was "Krazy Kelvin" that put you on to them and that I would like "commission please" !!!
They are in New Zealand & in Australia. Its a great idea, which could be spread around the world to other countries. You would only need 2 or 3 vans per country and paint them them with whatever is native to the particular country. All they would have to do then, is find people that are krazy enough to hire them. They shouldn't have any problems though if they keep to the same ideas as what they No charge for minor dents & scratches; unlimited kilometres; 24 hour roadside assistance; young drivers welcome; one way hire available; snow chains & heater included. Of course you don't need a campsite.
I hope they are telling people, that when they "park up" at night, not too park too near the sea or the taniwha sea monster, may come up out of the sea & get thee. It will be "Meals On Wheels" - the main course on the inside, with dessert on the outside. I won't repeat the "post" about the thief who tried to steal petrol from a camper van - look in the archives at the footnote on # 934 / Saturday 25th June.
Check out their campers at www.wickedcampers.com Ph.0800 246870
I hopepeople don't get the wrong idea about the website - you know wicked campers (naughty campers)
# 873. A Book In The Making - "Blogs - I Did It My Way" !!!
Well, 2 books really. One is going to be about blogging, which I am writing in the "K.I.S.S" (Keep It Simple Stupid) style. "I did my way" sort of thing, simple enough for anyone to follow. When it comes to computers, I am minus one. Computers & I don't mix - we are like oil & water. You all know how oil & water don't mix. April Fools Day this year, I first became interested in computers, when I was told about one those search sites to find friends. Boy - talk about coming out of the woodwork !!! In the process of finding old friends, I was also making new friends. I ended up by sending out a 3 page email "newsletter in mid-April to all the friends old & new that I found or who found me and then another newsletter in early May. On Black Friday 13th May I picked up an old, womans magazine to read during lunch. I only picked ity up, because it had my birth date - 31st January - on the cover, no other reason. Inside the magazine was a one page article about starting your own blog which you could get from www.blospot.com That night, I started my first blog - "Kelvin a Memory Always". Within 5 weeks, Yahoo had it listed on their search @ #1 out of 109,000. The rest as the saying goes is "history" as I have blogged on & on & on !!!
# 874. The Second Book !!!
A copy of the Posts # 900 - 999, is in the hands of a printer. But.... I have yet to sit down and "clean" it up a bit, before actually going to print. The hardest part will be deciding how many copies to get printed off. Approx.105 copies have been pre-sold already without even a price been set. No money has change hands as yet of course, because I may decide to "pull the plug" and let the idea go down the "S" bend. One thing for certain is, that I will never "delete" the blog from the system. as I put my heart & soul as well as blood, sweat & tears into my blogs. Of course, there has been a few laughs as well. When I saw friends - "Muggins", who is a big man of 24 stone, with "tears of laughter" rolling down his checks and Granny Smith (80+) rolling around on the floor in laughter (at her age) I knew there must be something in my stories !!! Whether, turn out or the words used, I don't know. As I tell anyone new, starting out - "blog to express yourself. Don't blog to try and imppress your friends".
I need a name for the second book - any suggestions, anyone. As long as it isn't rude !!! Send me an email email@example.com or firstname.lastname@example.org If the name you suggest is the one I use, I will send you a copy of the book. I will even autograph it for you. How's that for been a friend. All the other friends & family can "buy a copy" !!! No one gets a free ride, when they come on board my krazy krazy blogs. Once you are on board and you want to get off, we will slow down so you can jump off. We don't stop to let anyone off, because we have such a weight on board, it takes a while for us to get back up to speed again, when I put the "pedal to the metal" !!! Just be careful though when you jump off and hit the road, we don't run you over.
# 875. Living - Baking Soda
Balloon Blower - This will keep the "little kids & the big kids" amused for 5 minutes. Put 2 tablespoons of water in an empty soft drink bottle. Add 1 teaspoon of Baking Soda and 4 tablespoons of white vinegar. Stretch the balloon over the neck of the bottle and you will find that the carbon dioxide released will inflate the balloons.
Antichlorine Hair Rinse - If you have been swimming, over-chlorinated pool water can leave hair dull or discoloured. Counteract the effect of chlorine, by rinising your hair with a solution of half a teaspoon of baking soda, per pint of water.
# 876. "Flag It & Spam" !!!
I have been helping people over the internet with not only starting their own blogs, but also helping other bloggers, who have been blogging much longer than I have, with blog problems. One person in a far off country, I had to talk him through the process of deleting "spam" from his comments. It may look good, when someone first starts reading one of your posts, that you have "10 comments", but if 8 of those are from spammers, it don't look so good. I always say - delete spam, get rid of it forever. If you leave the saying - this comment has been deleted & the rubbish bin, people may start to get the ides, that you don't people leaving comments on your blog. So get rid of it, "forever" !!! . Blogspot have really come to the party - spam as you may well know, is computer generated. Spammers have programs/spiders searching through the internet world for "blogs/websites", especially "new sites" where they leave a spam message. They mainly always say something along the lines, of - "look at my site for such & such" !!! Spam, spam, spam !!! Blogspot now has a number generated system on new blogs, where the "human person" has to enter a given number, before they can have their comment posted. Which is good for bloggers and bad for spammers. Another good thing that Blogspot has done, with the blogs on their system is to add a flag. You may of notice it, on the top-right-hand corner of your blog. If you find a site, which has porn, etc on it, all you need to do is "click on the flag". This will show up back at blog headquarters and they will look into why the blog has been flagged. It will be good-bye porn or what ever it is. They are also sites, which are just "pure advertising", which stick out like a, I don't know what. Its going to create extra work" for them, but they would not of given you the opportunity to "flag it" if they didn't think it was worth while.
There may be a change of venue, as the internet cafe I have been using is still "holding" their price @ $3 per hour when most of the other cafes have dropped thier price back down to $2 per hour. Overnight from 11pm to 8am is $10 still, but I saw one of the other cafes on Queen St, is offering overnight from 10pm to 8am for $10. So, the same old thing - shop around. I like the cafe where I hang out, because you have room to 'spread your bits", where as most of the other cafes don't give you much room at all. In fact one one cafe I looked at today had about 8 computers squuezed into a place, no bigger than a "dog box" - a big dog box !!!
# 877. A Little Bit Of Blond Humour (Sorry Blondes)
A blond was standing in front of the mirror with her eyes closed. When her husband asked her what she was doing, she replied " I am having a look to see what I look like when I am asleep".
A blond said to her husband "There's a good movie on, that we can see, but we need 17 other people to go with us.When her husband asked her why couldn't just the two of them go, the blond replied "Because it says only 18 and over admitted".
Why can't American blonds dial 911 in an emergency ? Because they can't find 11 on the phone !!!
A blond tried the "Balloon Blower" but she only got as far as the two spoons. She put the two spoons & the soft drink bottle on the table, then sat there, scratching her head. When her husband asked her, what the matter was she replied "How are you supposed to get the table and the two spoons into the soft drink bottle. (put two table spoons ???)
# 878. Hurricane Katrina
What can you say ??? As with anything, it is easy enough to "speak your mind" after its happened. I posted two websites on Sunday's news. Have a look as there is quite a lot of photos/stories,etc there.
Footnote:I'll post a link here to these 2 websites tonight, to make it easy for you, but if you can wait, check out blog # 10.
# 879 Around New Zealand
There is one place in Auckland, where you get a really great view if you climb to the top, or if you are scared of heights, you can always "jump off" (attached of course) The only catch is, you have to pay the man, your money or you won't be able to do either. For those of you wondering what in earth, I am talking about, wonder no more for here's www.skycity.co.nz for you to check out.
I'll be back............I'll try to be more regular in my habits, not that you needed to know that !!!